No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
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