Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
