bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
