Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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