i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
