the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
