Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
