you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
