Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
