I can tuck mytits in my pants
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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