my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
