Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
My dad is sitting where you rode me
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
