we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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