Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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