Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
