your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
