I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
bring money and cleavage
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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