So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
