but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
