fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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