You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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