how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
