Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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