he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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