You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
