Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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