Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
