normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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