Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
