i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
