you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Randomize
