he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
