she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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