Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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