so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
