Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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