I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
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