she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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