Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
