New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
