This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
