We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Randomize
