Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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