a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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