shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize