have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
