I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
