Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
