i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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