she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
